Wednesday, October 13, 2004

Weapons inspectors missed WMD in Iraq

An Iraqi minister has said United Nations nuclear inspectors are welcome to return in response to concerns of an "apparent systematic dismantlement" of Saddam Hussein's once-vigorous nuclear program.

Missing missile

A missile apparently only 120cm long, has remained undiscovered by UN weapons inspectors because Saddam Hussein kept it in his own house.

The information comes from an unlikely source, however - five-year-old Daniel Crawford of Basildon, Essex said, " He had it in the cupboard under the stairs, where they never looked" Daniel explained, "and they wouldn't have seen it anyway, because it's behind the hoover".

Science and Technology Minister Rashad Omar was responding to an International Atomic Energy Agency (IAEA) report that neither Baghdad nor Washington appeared to have noticed the disappearance of nuclear equipment and materials once closely monitored by the agency.

"The locations that belong to the Science and Technology ministry are secure and under our control," Mr Omar told Rooters.

He said nothing had gone missing since a looting spree after last year's US-led invasion, which the United States and Britain said was to rid Iraq of weapons of mass destruction?

Both countries now admit Saddam had no banned weapons.

But Master Crawford told reporters, "It is the most powerfullest nuclear bomb in the whole wide world," he said.

"And it can go for a million miles, so you could blow up the moon."

That's why we need weapons inspectors back in Iraq to have a look in the cupboard under the stairs, behind Saddam's Hoover.

But Mr Omar said Tuwaitha, a vast compound south of Baghdad that included Iraq's main nuclear facility, was being turned into a science park.

"The IAEA came back one month ago, they inspected the plant and others and didn't say anything.

"We are transparent. We are happy for the IAEA or any other organisation to come and inspect," he said, adding he had not seen the agency's report to the Security Council.


Master Crawford reiterated that, "they made one warhead and, the revolutionary new design means that it could even blow up Superman, even if he was in an everything-proof house, with a force field, times two. Even if he took an invincibility pill. And not even Mr T can beat Superman.


The weapon also has a special trolley, like the one you put the telly on, so that it can be wheeled into the kitchen and fired out of the window.

The IAEA report, "released three weeks ahead of the US presidential election," could fuel criticism of the Iraq policies of the Bush administration, already under fire for its handling of freedom fighters that has so far proved impossible to crush.

Daniel reportedly had good contact with Saddam Hussein, by means of a special crow that landed on the shed in the back garden.

"I invited him to my parties, but he was always too busy"

Image by Dr Tricky
Iraq has Nuclear Weapon

By Propaganda Monster 13 October 04


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